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How Are You Celebrating National Corn Dog Day?

srw@thewordwire.com (TheWordWire) — Sat, 20 Mar 2010 17:21:00 GMT

And you thought today was just the start of spring in the Northern Hemisphere. For Americans, it's National Corn Dog Day. In this household, we're celebrating something more special on this day of new beginnings and corny traditions: It also happens to be Rufus' birthday!

We're not having corn dogs.

But it does seem somehow apropos. The last year of his being has been documented in a series of carnival-of-life posts.

So if you'll indulge me, I'd like to honor Rufus by taking a look back. How are you celebrating National Corn Dog Day? I'm counting the many reasons why Rufus is a beloved character in my life...

The Introduction: Smarter Than He Looks

Rufus is a codename. The man behind the silly blogger is pretty smart - he knew to choose one that would suit the caricature he'd become. From his debut as a beloved character in my life, it's been clear: He's waaaaaaay smarter than he looks.

I'd Like a Beaver Press, Please

He chose Rufus because he knows me and all my dorky little habits. The fact that I cannot pass through a small town without picking up the local paper, for example, is such a nerd alert, I belong with a Rhymes-with-Doofus. But this little personal quirk sometimes brings great insights. Here's how Rufus inspired a revelation about the whole fledgling industry when I absolutely had to have a Beaver Press.

Non-Spurious Cream and Other Job Hunt Essentials

And though he may make fun of my obsession with newspapers, he's been known to pick up a copy, himself. That's where he found this want ad for an exciting career opportunity. It inspired this ever-so helpful post about Non-Spurious Cream and Other Job Hunt Essentials.

Confucius Rufus Say The Keys to Success

He's not merely smart. He's wise like Confucius. Seriously. Just look at what I found in the kitchen drawer -- Confucius Rufus' Key to Success.

One Small Misstep For Woman On One Grand Jete For Mankind

I do sometimes have to stop and wonder though: Is there a difference between "smart" and "know it all"? Because Rufus does seem to know all. I mean, come on -- he's known all along that there's no such thing as magic boots. It's humbling.

Who Wants To Know If They're a Cougar?

He might understand physics better than I do, but I still claim to have a better grasp on physique. This story is classic "He Said, She Said" on the topic of Cougars. For as long as the question in this most-read column goes unanswered, I'll continue believing I'm right.

How to McGyver a Christmas Tree

Of course, if creativity is any indication of genius, then Rufus proves his smarts all the time. These are skills that can be transferred to year-round projects -- Here's how Rufus demonstrates his ingenuity by teaching us how to McGyver a Christmas Tree.

Please Don't Put JJelly In My Jjambbong, Bob

Of course, even smart guys get tripped up in situations with a language barrier. Not even the server in the Korean restaurant we visited could help free him of ignorance. I don't know how to tell you not to make the same mistake. I think you just have to specify that you don't want jjelly in your jjambbong, just in case.

Green Thumb Against Backdrop of Brown: The Mojave Crop

I think it's obvious that he's smart. But what's more attractive is the fact that he's caring. He's determined and hard-working, as evidenced by his Mojave Crop.

Happy Birthday Baby-- Let spring and your new year begin! How ever the rest of you choose to celebrate -- or not -- Happy National Corn Dog Day to all of you.

Photo Friday: The Legend of Dead Horse Point

srw@thewordwire.com (TheWordWire) — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 07:01:00 GMT

Dead Horse Point State Park, Utah
32 miles from Moab, on the way to Canyonlands National Park

Utah! It's often spelled with an exclamation point. Once you visit, it's easy to see why. Since the last two Photo Fridays here have been dedicated to the excited punctuation-worthy Canyonlands(!!!), I thought I'd use today's post to tell you about a different kind of point:

Dead Horse Point!

Oh, it deserves that little punctuation punch too. It's a Utah State Park, located just 32 miles from Moab. You come to the entrance on the way to Island in the Sky, the north district of Canyonlands. I recommend stopping -- It's well worth the extra time.

Dead Horse Point overlooks the Colorado River 2,000 heart-stopping feet below. You're 6,000 feet above sea level, and at least 1,000 miles from your troubles.

It's simply breathtaking.

You wouldn't think a spot with such a grave-sounding name would bring about feelings of peace. Life may not have been entirely peaceful for the early ranchers who survived on this rugged land. This spot was more valued for its utility than scenery.

It was the perfect natural corral for wild horses roped and rounded up. Sheer drops into the canyon made the strip of land inescapable from either side, and the exit easily fenced off. Cowboys broke the best horses for personal use, and sold some to people in other areas -- before the car, I imagine this was big business.

One version of the legend says the "leftovers" were left behind without water. A tragic irony, the captives died within view of the unreachable river. A more romantic version of the story says the gate was left open for the unwanted to run free. For some unexplained reason, they didn't. The spot was too mesmerizing and beautiful is what we're intended to believe.

The human history of the place goes back a whole lot farther than the cowboys. And relative to its geologic history, the story behind the name is just a speck of time. If you're visiting Moab area and headed to Canyonlands, don't miss Dead Horse Point -- these days it's about scenery not utility. The stunning panorama is sure to add another exclamation point to the memories of your trip.

Thanks to Delicious Baby for hosting travel stories for Photo Friday.

The Lazy Worm Survives The Early Bird

srw@thewordwire.com (TheWordWire) — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 07:15:00 GMT

Photo: Hooked on Life

"If the damned worm would just learn to sleep in a little longer, the early bird gon' go and eat sum'n else." -- Unknown

This is the philosophy of man I once overheard in New Orleans. I suspect he might have lived on a regular Breakfast of Champions himself. You know -- the kind of breakfast that includes beer and cold pizza . You would probably never hear this kind of sentiment from someone who eats from a Wheaties box.

Oh, sage advocate for laziness - where do you find the stamina to come up with such revolutionary ideas?

It stands to reason, I guess. The lazy worm would survive the early bird... but I bet the feathered lunch crowd is just as hungry. What kind of victory is it for the worm, anyway? It's still got to compete with all the morning risk-takers for its own food.

The late bird catches the lazy worm. The early bird catches sum'n better. Rearranging an adage doesn't reorder the way of the world.

This is all very easy for me to point out, because I am an early bird. I don't know how many proverbial worms I catch because of it, but it's not unusual for me to have my coffee before the birds even start the morning hunt.

My point isn't really about what time to wake up. Sleep as long as you can if that suits you. Have whatever Breakfast of Champions you like. I just think it's curious, this disguised wisdom identifying with the worm, and not the bird. I don't know about you, but I aspire to be higher on the food chain, even if the lazy worm does survive past lunch.

Today's Theme Thursday topic is breakfast. Bon appetit, early birds.

Kiss Me, I'm Foolish: Luck of the [Pretending to Be] Irish

srw@thewordwire.com (TheWordWire) — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 15:36:00 GMT

photo: kk

This is not the man I met, but I sure do like his style. KK snapped this shot at an Irish Heritage Festival in Vancouver. Parties celebrating St. Patrick and the Irish are taking place all across the globe today. For a list of fun Irish pubs in the US, see Laura Martone's American Nomad post as a guide.

You know the Irish haven't been particularly lucky, right? Oh, I'm sure there have been individuals who've struck gold or caught the big one. But with the country's history of colonization, starvation and mass emigration, that whole Luck of the Irish thing is ironic.

I have the luck of the Irish. At least, I did when I attended St. Patrick's Day festival in Savannah, GA, which boasts the second largest gathering of green-clad revelers in the US. What a party! It was fantastic! I was all of 20 at the time. And I thank my lucky shamrocks only my ego got hurt.

Don't get the wrong impression of Savannah's annual spectacle just because I had bad luck. It wasn't the crowd that posed a danger. It was that one cute guy in the window of the pub.

It was totally his fault.

See, Savannah's historic district has beautiful centuries-old architecture that lines the pedestrian walk. Many of these buildings now house great cafes and bars with sidewalk seating or big old-style windows that open to the world.

The cute guy was sitting at a table parked in the open window of one of these places. The grand wooden window frame made him seem like a painting I'd like to take home and hang on the wall. He winked at me as my friends and I were parading past on the sidewalk, which was all it took to make the party around me fade into a dream.

I smiled back with flirty "Kiss Me, I'm Pretending to be Irish" eyes. For the record, this is different than "You're Getting Lucky." But it turned out not to matter what my facial expression meant, because it's the look of surprise that came next he'd be more likely to remember.

I heard my name. It was called out in a shrill kind of scream, really. My friend was trying to warn me. But I didn't turn around in time to see the modern fixture in this old-world dreamland. I just tripped right over the fire hydrant.

Airborne.

Over a fire hydrant.

Uh-huh.

Inertia took the top part of my body after my legs had been knocked off balance by the steel obstruction. And as we know, a body in motion will stay in motion until something like, say, a sidewalk pushes against it.

I would like to think the cute guy in the window gave me style points for not chipping a tooth or breaking my neck. But it's more likely he was laughing even harder than my friends.

And let me tell you: they were laughing pretty hard. None of 'em were much help as I tried to untangle my legs from around the hydrant, and right myself in the midst of my own convulsive giggles. But I cut them some slack, because I had help... from the leprechaun who reacted faster.

A man in a green top-hat and tail-coat had seen this scene play out from a distance, and came swinging his shillelagh over as soon as it happened. It's oh-so easy to be humble when passersby gather to watch a spritely man in sequins check your knees and elbows for scrapes.

I was fine. Really, I was. My embarrassed gratitude must have translated to "Kiss Me, I'm Foolish." The nice leprechaun kissed my bruised elbow, and bid us all a lucky day. So to you, dear reader, how ever you maybe celebrating today -- I wish you the kind of luck that's not ironic... unless you want to be kissed by heroic men in tights.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Beware the March of Chides

srw@thewordwire.com (TheWordWire) — Mon, 15 Mar 2010 18:48:46 GMT

This is our cat Jackpot doing his Julius Caesar impression this morning. I forgot to tell him to "Beware the Ides of March."

"Beware the Ides of March."

What a great soundbite. If William Shakespeare were living today, he'd surely be inducted into the political spin-zone as a guy who knows how to make public opinion shift.

"Beware the Ides of March" is the line he wrote for a soothsayer -- the character of a first century psychic in an Elizabethan-era play. She said it to warn Caesar of the conspiracy against him. It's short and catchy, suspenseful and a little gossipy without evidence or detail -- perfect for the news of today.

Can't you imagine the montage of pundits and anchors repeating the line again and again? Like an ad campaign, branded. But with plausible deniability about spreading propaganda, because it's merely reporting what some wise oracle said.

Jackpot here doesn't fall for that kind of drama. My little thespian is a satirist at heart. Sure, it happens to be true that Caesar was assassinated on March 15th, and that some accounts of history say he was warned of it. But Jackpot knows that if ancient Roman news producers had given this prediction any attention on the 14th, they would've just been using it as a talking-point to promote agenda, not reporting fact. Before the Ides of March, it would have been about the march of political chides, skewed depending on your demographic.

Beware the march of chides.

Short and catchy, suspenseful and a little gossipy without evidence or detail -- perfect for the blog post of the day.

I know - some of you think I'm exploiting my cute cat. You think he was just napping and I happened to catch him in a Shakespearean pose. Then how do you explain why he's standing at the food bowl reciting Friends Romans Countrymen right now? I must go lend him my ear. He only gives speeches when he needs something.

Wanderlust SUN Day: Places to Celebrate a Long Day

srw@thewordwire.com (TheWordWire) — Sun, 14 Mar 2010 08:04:00 GMT

A long day doesn't sound like a thing to look forward to unless you're talking about extended sunlight. Ahhhhh, magnificent sun -- I think losing an hour today is a small price for more of the stuff going forward. Yeah, I know. It's the Earth's rotation that affects when we see the sun, and the Vernal Equinox is still a week away. But as a resident of the Northern Hemisphere in March, I'm okay with the time change to help the long days along.

So I made a list on this first day of Daylight Savings -- Places to celebrate a long day. My selections are limited to the US, but please enlighten us with other suggestions if you'd like to.

Bryce Canyon Sunrise Point
Bryce, UT

Photo: Picture Taking Fool

It's only fitting to start this celebration of sun at first light. Bryce Canyon's famed Sunrise Point is named for its stunning views at dawn. In my opinion, any national park is a reason to celebrate daylight. I have never visited one that I wasn't racing against the sunset to see... do... experience... more of it.

Carlsbad Flower Fields
Carlsbad, CA

Photo: Bill Gracey

Flowers are a pretty phenomenal gift from sunlight, and Carlsbad, CA Flower Fields offer a jaw-dropping display. Fifty acres on a hillside overlooking the Ocean are completely awash with vibrant colors. Located in San Diego's North County, spring comes early -- According to their website, twenty acres are now blooming.

Dane County Farmers' Market
Madison, WI

Photo: beautifulcataya

Fruits and veggies like long days. And I like fruits and veggies. So I highlight Wisconsin's Dane County Farmers' Market in this celebration of sunlight. According to Diddit.com, it ranks as the largest producer-only farmers' market in the US. Of course, you don't have to travel to Madison, WI to shop for fresh produce. But in my opinion, if you're visiting somewhere with a good one, it's worth checking out.

Gauley River Rafting
Lansing, WV

The thing about longer days is that it allows more time to have outdoor fun. That's not news. You know this. Things like hiking, nature watching, and rafting really need natural light. When we rafted the Colorado River last summer, our guide was a lifelong river runner. Though I've never been to The Upper Gauley in West Virginia, I trust his recommendation that it is the wildest, most adventurous white water rafting experience in the country.

Hanalei Bay
Kauai, HI

Photo: Jeremy Hall

It practically goes without saying that time at the beach is a reason to relish longer days. This shot is of Kauai's Hanalei Bay, considered by Petrix to earn top rank among all US beaches. Is it the best spot? That's highly arguable in a category with such tough competition. It just makes me smile and appreciate all the other possibilities.

Rock City
Chattanooga, TN

Photo: aeu04117

Sunlight gives visibility, and this high altitude spot on the Georgia / Tennessee border punctuates how sunlight is needed for that. This is "Lover's Leap" at Rock City, where visitors can look to the horizon and see seven states at once.

Santa Monica Pier Ferris Wheel
Santa Monica, CA

photo: saarinen

Visiting the famed Santa Monica Pier is a fun way to spend a day, which is reason enough to mention. But did you know the ferris wheel there is the world's first to run on solar power? At night - still powered by solar reserves - it lights up with LED lights.

Photo Friday: Canyonlands Needles

srw@thewordwire.com (TheWordWire) — Fri, 12 Mar 2010 07:12:02 GMT

Tent with a view: We used Mike Matson's Moon Utah Camping guide to make decisions on where to set up camp. We wouldn't have found this perfect private spot within view of the Canyonlands Needles without it.

Southern Utah's Canyonlands National Park is divided into north and south districts. The North district is called Island in the Sky, which I shared in last week's post. Just 15 miles as the crow flies, but 137 miles by car is the south district called Needles.

Needles is a lot lower in elevation than The Island, so it offers greater opportunities for extended hiking and 4WD exploration.

We took the Elephant Canyon Trail, though we did not hike the length of the 11-mile loop to see the famed Druid Arch. Even still, our 2ish-mile leisure walk did not disappoint.

Once you get beyond the steep, but short, Elephant Hill, you find yourself on a level trail in a maze of interesting rocks.

Then you get some perspective and get to see what you're walking across the tops of. I don't know what these pillar-like features are called, but it's pretty surreal to walk along them.

Once The Needles are in sight, you start to feel like you're looking at Oz. It reminded me of the skyline of a distant city, but too dreamlike to be of this world.

The Needles themselves are massive red and white eroded sandstone pillars that extend for miles beyond this shot. We were losing daylight and expected rainy weather, so this was as close on the trail as we got.

Thanks as always to Delicious Baby for hosting travel-inspired Photo Friday stories.

One Size Head Fits All Hats

srw@thewordwire.com (TheWordWire) — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 19:19:00 GMT

Today's Theme Thursday topic is HAT. And my first thought was: just one?

What hat you wear symbolizes profession -- a visual representation of that thing you do. You know -- that thing -- As if there's only one, for which one size hat fits all. Of course, anyone in the workplace will tell you it doesn't quite work like that. It seems more likely your one size head needs to fit all hats.

I bet you can relate to this...

Photo: Paida70

You put on your thinking cap to solve a problem or come up with a new idea.

Photo: Cooperis

You must then pimp the idea to secure funding.

Once somebody in an accountant's visor peers over the top of his or her glasses to approve, your work is really cut out for you then...

Photo: jmtimages

You wrangle the details...

Photo: GregWake

Detect the potential pitfalls...

Photo: KayVeeInc

Put out the fires...

Photo: Robin Hutton

And police the rules.

Familiar? Sure it is. Bet you've worn even more hats than that. Count your roles as parent, spouse, child, and citizen, and you better have one over-sized hat box. It's good though, this variety. I happen to like lots of costume changes in a day. So if you'll excuse me, I'm going to put on my thinking cap. I need to solve some problems and figure out some new ideas.

How To Make An Impression On The Woman of the Year

srw@thewordwire.com (TheWordWire) — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 15:00:00 GMT

Photo: Hustle Roses

You know I can tap dance right? Hey, I'm no Gregory Hines, rest his soul, but I've got some moves.

I don't know how this came up on my second day of work. It was a tid-bit I threw out during a game of "Get To Know The Newbie." My new teammates were gathered round my cube interviewing me to make sure I was their kind of people.

The feisty one with the fun-loving smile asked me to prove it. Her adopted catch phrase around there was, "Love your show!" And she wanted to see mine right then and there.

"Absolutely not." I told her. I was a professional woman -- whatever I thought that meant at age 27. It was fine that she accused me of bluffing -- I would not be auditioning for the role of department clown.

Besides, it was clear the group already had one of those. Ms. "Love Your Show" sincerely loved people, which was obvious from the way they were all drawn to her. She made people laugh with her silly antics, never with catty jokes at someone else's expense. Even on my second day of work I could tell she was a kind soul.

Later that day I went to the restroom. And whose great shoes should appear in the stall next to me, but Ms. "Love Your Show's" This was private time, so I dared not interrupt her thoughts by announcing myself and saying hello.

But the clown in me saw an opportunity. The chance to prove I'm trustworthy and not a liar, at a time she would least expect. Please no Larry Craig jokes here -- I'm being serious. This is the moment we made lifelong friends:

I straightened my skirt and cleared my throat. I said nothing. Just moved my feet:

Tap, hop, step, fa-lap, step, shuffle, hop, toe, heel!

Other side!

Tap, hop, step, fa-lap, step, shuffle, hop, toe, heel!

Have you ever heard an uncontrolled laugh reverberate off a bathroom wall? Try two people laughing, because I started giggling in reaction to her.

That was a decade ago, and we've both moved on to other things since. She's still proving she's a good soul. Obviously, because the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society of San Diego, where she volunteers a lot of her time, has nominated her for 2010 Woman of the Year!

"Don't be misled by the name of the campaign, as it is NOT about me or my team," she wrote in the email making this announcement. Humble, like all altruistic good souls are.

"It is simply about raising money to save lives."

Simply about saving lives. No big deal.

It's a ten-week national fund raising competition that kicks-off tomorrow. With your help -- if you're so inclined -- she and the team she's rounded up can reach their $50,000 goal.

Don't go away -- I know you may not have cash. They're planning a charity auction you might be able to contribute to. She's looking for:

"Anything from collector’s items, gift cards, service certificates, restaurant certificates, airline tickets, hotel stays, or even the donating of space for upcoming events."

If you would like to make an impression on this would-be "The Woman of the Year" without tap dancing in a bathroom, you can make a tax deductible donation of money or auction items to this cause. Cash donations are accepted starting March 11th, 2010. Please visit Gellie Go-Meyer's "Woman of the Year Campaign" Fund Raising Page.

Good luck, dear friend - I'm glad I met you. Knew you were an angel from day one. Love your show!

The Shape of Time and Progress

srw@thewordwire.com (TheWordWire) — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 17:06:00 GMT

photo: kapungo

Back when Ronni and I knew everything, we'd sit around reflecting on our vast real-world experience. We were old and wise. I mean, seriously - we were legal. So after classes and our minimum-wage jobs wrapped up for the day, we'd take our 21 year-old selves to the bar to talk philosophy.

Sometimes we'd engage in healthy debate.

I argued, essentially, that we were currently living the renaissance of our lives. As we entered the workforce after graduation, our careers would give us increasingly specialized knowledge.

Splat.

What I was describing was a pyramid - like an upside down ice cream cone, Ronni thought. She wondered why I'd want to know less as I got older. She thought the cone should be the other way -- biggest at the top after a lifetime of learning.

Hmmm...

We had a sip of cheap draft and went on to discuss other heady things like where to go for spring break and how it was better to date a guitarist than a drummer.

Like I said. We knew everything.

Now I believe -- read: I don't know, but I think -- we were both wrong about the geometry of knowledge. It's not a cone at all. It's a spiral. Have you noticed this too, or is it just me? Time may march in one direction, but progression through life seems to go in circles.

I don't know how many times I've been surprised to realize I'd "come full-circle" on something since the day I was so sure the shape of things to come was like a cone. I chalk it up to irony when things in the past on life's time line somehow come around again.

Nature goes in circles, you know. Tides, seasons, sunrises and sunsets... they all come and go in predictable cycles. I don't know what that has to do with the shape of time and progress, but it's somehow comforting to know I'm in good company.

Now that I'm older and sure of less than I was at age 21, I laugh at those conversations back then. Not about which way the proverbial cone is facing -- that's so abstract it sounds wise. But our vacation choices and thoughts on men? At least now, on those topics, we are wise, and that's what I call progress.